hi there

I don't know why I haven't posted in so long. It certainly isn't for lack of things to say . . . It's true that I have been incredibly busy, but I think it is also that the longer I wait the more I feel like it would take me forever to write about everything that has been going on and so I don't bother to try. I will now boil it down to the most basic details and hopefully start anew from here.

1. I had an appointment with my chosen RE. It was good. He looked over all my records from my gynecologist (and went over them with me in great detail) and ordered a bit more bloodwork. He agreed that I could try metformin (though he agreed with my gyno that clomid was a better bet) and he doubled the dose to 2000 mg. Told me to come back in six weeks with my bbt chart.

2. Al submitted a semen sample for analysis. The result was "excellent". That was according to the voicemail the nurse left on his cellphone. He made me listen to it. Twice. To say he was proud would be quite the understatement.

3. We told my in-laws that we have been trying for a while and are now seeing a specialist. They were very supportive and optimistic in an encouraging (not annoying) way. It was nice.

4. I went back to the RE. This was after one cycle on the original dose of met and one on the doubled dose (in the middle of the third met cycle, total). No signs of ovulation. He prescribed clomid, 50 mg/day, days 2-6. Told me to keep charting and come back in six weeks to talk about what happened with the clomid . . . "maybe you'll be pregnant by then." He didn't say it like he thought it would actually happen. It still freaked me out.

[Interestingly, while I have not ovulated on metformin, it has, for lack of a better word, normalized my cycles. Rendered them actually cyclical for the first time in my life, sans birth control pills. 26 days long, three times in a row now. And while I still have more days of bleeding than I personally find enjoyable, there has been absolutely no midcycle spotting since starting metformin. I am very excited about this! I asked Dr. RE (lame name, I know) if this meant the met was helping, even though I had not ovulated. He said, "I don't know."]

5. I waited nervously for day 1. I was still leery of taking clomid, after all the horror stories I have heard. All in all, it has not been so bad. No side effects the first day. After the second pill I had a few hours of extreme nausea. I freaked out because it was horrible and I didn't know if I could keep going. After the third (and fourth, and fifth) pill there was no nausea and I freaked out because that might mean the dose wasn't high enough and it wasn't working. I am on day 9 now and other than the nausea the clomid has caused 3 days of headaches and mild bloating. I wouldn't recommend taking it recreationally, but not too bad so far.

6. Now I am waiting, hoping, praying that the clomid (+ metformin, which I am still taking) will do the trick and I will actually ovulate. Please, please, please. However, most of the time I don't think it will. I don't know why but I just can't believe that it will be this "easy".